I write this to you in a desperate attempt to procrastinate (Sorry Mom and Dad, can’t get around it!). I also have not written since school started so this is a friendly reminder that yes, despite my atrocious work load, I am in fact still alive. I have very nearly given myself entirely to school, forgoing all sanity and free time. As my poor intramural soccer team knows, I basically do not exist outside of a few commitments (not that they are missing out on my athletic skills. My absence is probably better for them 🙂 ). Don’t get me wrong, there are times where I appreciate being busy. Having nothing to do is far worse in my mind. I do, however, appreciate the extra minute or two to sleep, eat and breath now and again. Despite my apparent lack of time however, I have been doing a lot of thinking about my future career choices and my current major (that is, the Communications w/ Media Studies).
I know what you are saying, “Oh no, not again.” For those of you just joining this adventure, I’m on to my third major in 3 semesters here at Roberts.
Do not fear! I am not changing majors, I’m just thinking about where it will be taking me. Communications is wonderful, I have loved nearly every second of the courses I’m in this year (Darn you Communication Theory tests!!!) but like my parents, I have thought to myself “Where the heck will this take me in life?” To be honest, I had never heard of a Communications Major until last year when I met Dr. Mrs. in 3 classes. I gathered she rather enjoyed this area of study, seeing as she is the head of the department and my current adviser. This summer I signed up for it and decided to give it a whirl. Heck, I was ready to try anything that might steer me towards a concrete future. How silly to think that was the case. Still without the comfort of job security, I threw on a concentration of Media Studies for good measure. Possibly the best move academically that I have made so far.
This semester I have been taking a Black and White Photography course where I have the privilege of taking and developing my own photos in an on-campus darkroom. Those of you who know my family know that I grew up with a man who loves photography. Namely, my father. Naturally I tried it out, enjoyed it as a hobby, and never considered taking it any further. This course has really changed my feelings about photography. It was no longer a hobby that I had experience with. It became and has remained a very realistic career possibility. The idea of owning my own studio and photography business is my new dream job. The more I think about it, the more I want it to be real.
You might be, as I did for about a week, yelling at me for leaving the art department because that is where the photography majors are, and this is what I have to say to that. There are two reasons that I believe I am in the right place for where I want to go:
First, I do not want to have a major that confines me to one possibility. I want to graduate college with opportunities to do what I want (sorry for the extra cheese on that one) and I don’t want to live a streamlined life that takes me in one direction. Communication allows me to take so many routes in my future, its not funny. I could go into photojournalism, work at a news station, write/take pictures for a newspaper, or quite honestly, whatever it is I want to do. That is the beauty of communications: you aren’t forced into one job the rest of you’re life. Now, let me say this before someone hates me. People who have majors that specialize and train for specific jobs are wonderful. I just can’t function like that. I’m so indecisive, or at least I think I am, that one job won’t ever be enough for me. I’ll be honest, I probably will be the kind of person who holds multiple jobs throughout my lifetime, not quite settling into one. Who knows, maybe I’m wrong. That is just how I feel about it now.
Second, I tried the whole art major thing last year, and I just didn’t quite fit. Many of the classes were classes I was forced to take. I am not made for drawing or sculpting great works and often the pieces I created in studio classes were spawned out of necessity, not some form of teenage angst, or some view I had on a particular topic. I admit to faking much of the meaning and symbolism of my work after I had created it because my teacher said so and I needed to pass. Again, before people hate me, art is beautiful. I want to be a photographer, so that should say something. I am just not always so passionate about making art for the sake of someone else, and I didn’t like being graded on my creativity. I would get grades that I didn’t agree with and then feel as though my creativity and artistic interpretations were being ignored, and it created some undeserved resentment toward my teachers. Some may say that I still need to develop my artistic eye or need to stop being so sensitive to my critics and take it in stride. They are probably right, but I would rather take art classes that I enjoy and will use later on. I do have to take art classes, but they are more directed toward my areas of interest, and I will just have to put on my big-girl pants and deal with it for a few more classes, but at least they will be classes I want to take, not classes I am forced to take.
Whew. That was a wordy one. A thousand apologies. I just thought it was important to get that out and processed in my own brain, while letting you all into that scary jungle known as my brain as well.
Now back to your regularly scheduled program.