It’s been awhile, hasn’t it? You’d think that with school out, I’d have all the time in the world to write and such. I have and I haven’t, I suppose. See, I work every day, whether at the Country Club down the road or at the studio I intern at. Today was my first day off in weeks, and only because my boss called me off last night after working from 10 am to 10 pm (A fair deal I guess). It’s been busy, to say the least. Except that most shifts don’t span 12 hours, and I am usually home for half the day, with not much on my plate aside from showering. To be honest, productivity has been a bit on the low side for the past month, and I’m sick of it. I’m itching to do something, I just don’t know what. One can only clean their room so many times. Some suburban form of Cabin Fever is seeming pretty plausible right now.
Summers are for Mending Slowly
There has been an upside, however slight, to this slow start to summer. I’ve had a lot of time to spend with myself. There’s been lots of time to think and evaluate myself. Sometimes I like what I find, other times are not so pleasant. I’ve been learning a lot regardless, and its been really helpful in understanding more about life and why mine is the way it is. I’ve come to see how reserved and introverted I am, and how defensive I can get when I make a mistake.
I’ve also felt a sort of voice, but not quite a voice, talking to me, calming me, and guiding me. I know its Him, and He’s taught me a lot and comforted me in some areas of my life that were quite broken, and still are a little. I’ve felt Him healing my heart and spirit from all the beatings it has taken in the past 19 years, especially this last one, and He’s making me new again. I’m not quite there yet, to the point where He wants me to be and I have no idea how long it might take me to get there, but I’m getting there.
Here’s to mending,